This was earlier than we expected, but we knew that it could really be any day. I was 34 weeks 5 days pregnant. We had done the steroid shots for his lungs in case of an early arrival. My doctor had said that if we made it to 34 weeks, with the shots, hopefully we would avoid NICU time. We had met our first goal of 34 weeks. Things should be good!
Monday morning, I woke up around 5 am to use the bathroom, which was normal. I shuffled to the bathroom and quickly back to my bed, hoping to fall back asleep. I tossed and turned for a few minutes, which was also my new normal. Then my chest started hurting. I had battled Intrahepatic Cholestasis in Pregnancy and Pre-Eclampsia for about a month now, along with heart burn and indigestion. This was usually due to either indigestion or my blood pressure. So, I took a Zantac and checked my blood pressure. It was high- 152/104. My doctor didn't like my bottom number over 95. So, I took my blood pressure medicine and ran a warm bath. These were my go-to's to get it back down. Rocky was getting ready for work. Since these things usually helped lower it, I told him to go ahead and go to work, but to keep his phone on and answer no matter what, if I called. After my bath, I rested for 30 minutes and checked my bp again. I was surprised when it was 171/89, since these activities usually lowered it quite a bit. I tried to rest a little more, but my chest kept hurting me and I felt like I needed to get it checked out. At 7:41, I checked it again and texted Rocky to come home. It was 198/120! I texted my doctor and she told me to be at the office at 9:00, instead of for my regular appointment at 1:30. We threw some bags together in about 5 minutes and were on the way as soon as he got home.
During the ride to the office, I was in excruciating pain. I couldn't sit still. I felt like I was going to get sick. I told Rocky that something was really wrong, and that they were going to have to do something to fix it. When I got to the doctor's office, Tanya wasn't in yet, but had left instructions for her nurse to take my vitals and call her with them. The nurse came back to the room and told us Tanya would meet us at maternity admissions at the hospital. I sat in the admissions waiting room for probably 5-10 minutes, but it felt like hours because of the pain I was in. They took me back through a different area than when I was admitted to ante-natal a week ago. They checked my weight, blood pressure and drew blood for labs.
Tanya came to my room, and upon her entering, I heard her say to someone outside the room, "She has severe HELLP syndrome." I'd read about HELLP while researching pre-eclampsia, but I didn't know enough about it to really know what it meant. I'm glad now, at that point, that I didn't know more. When Tanya came in, she said, "Dr. Taavon is in surgery right now. He'll be done in about 30 minutes, and we will have a baby in about 45 minutes." I looked at Rocky and said, "Start calling people."
He called our parents, my brother and his cousin, and we sent text messages to our friends. Oh my goodness, we were about to be parents!
The nurse had me drink this terrible "drink" that is supposed to help reduce the acid in your stomach for the surgery. As soon as I got it down, it came right back up. They didn't seem too concerned about it though, and they got me ready to wheel me back to the OR.
Everything else went pretty quickly, except for how long it took them to let Rocky come back. Tanya came back and was with me the whole time. She told me that Rocky looked more nervous than I did. Surprisingly, I felt very calm about everything. I knew I was in good hands. The spinal didn't hurt at all. They finally got everything ready and let Rocky come back. He sat by my head and I remember us talking through the whole procedure. I don't really remember what we talked about, but our conversation was very normal and light hearted, especially for what was going on behind that blue sheet.
They finally said, "He's out, you can come over here dad." All I wanted to do was see him!!! Everything sounded like it was going well, especially when Tristan was SCREAMING! I knew that was a good thing! Finally, Rocky brought him over to me. The tears flowed down my face, but I tried so hard not to cry, because I didn't want the tears to blur my vision and me not be able to see him. He was absolutely gorgeous! My son was here, and he is perfect.
They told me that they had to take him to the NICU and that I would get to see him again after recovery. Before I knew it, they had wheeled me into recovery, and all of the nurses were talking about how well I was doing. I kept asking when I could see Tristan again, and they said as soon as I proved that I could move my legs, they would take me to a room, and I could see him on the way. So, I moved my legs. I could move the right one sooner than the left, but it wasn't long. Rocky came back to see me and told me that Tristan was wonderful. He told me his weight, and the nurse looked up all of his stats for me. He was born at 12:23 pm, weighed 3 pounds 13.9 ounces and was 18.11 inches long, and has a head full of dark hair!
After I left recovery, they rolled my bed into the NICU so I could see my sweet baby boy. Words cannot express how wonderful he is.
I had to go to ICU because they put me on magnesium, trying to get my body healthy again. I was in ICU from Monday afternoon until Wednesday afternoon. On Tuesday, Tanya told me that my body was worse than it was on Monday. All of my levels were more elevated and just not good. She said that we did everything just in time, and had we waited any longer, it would have been very dangerous for me and for Tristan. It was Wednesday before I looked up more information on HELLP syndrome, and realized that had we waited longer, my organs would have started shutting down.
There was so much that happened so quickly, and I was on the magnesium, which made me feel... just weird- is the only way I can describe it. I try to remember all of the details and everything that happened, but some stuff has left me already.
Tristan was making improvements daily and doing better, but I quickly realized that he would not be going home with us when we left. And the emotional roller coaster started. I cried every single day... happy tears, sad tears, scared tears, helpless tears, hopeful tears. I still cry daily, for one reason or another. But it's getting better. On Wednesday, a huge snow storm began. They were calling for 8-12 inches, and we do not get that kind of weather here in NC. Rocky ran home to get a few things, take care of the dogs, and get back before the weather got too bad. Tanya told me that I would not be discharged on Thursday, but most likely on Friday.
We sat in the NICU, held Tristan and watched it snow. It was as peaceful as the situation could call for. My little family, all together, getting snowed in. The only thing that would have been better would have been doing it from our living room.
On Friday, I was discharged. This may have possibly been the hardest day of my life. I had to walk out of the hospital without my baby, while he stayed. Rocky, my brother and I went out for dinner. I tried my best to have a "normal" time
Each day gets a little better. Especially since I see Tristan doing so well and making so many improvements. I truly cherish every minute that I get to hold him and spend with him. Having him lay on my chest is my absolute favorite thing in the whole world.
Rocky and I cannot wait to have our sweet boy home with us and to start our lives as a family, all together.
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